so serabut

*woot*
xtau kenape suke sangat buat bunyi tu..hikhik sekarang dalam kul 4 pagi tapi mateku sangat cerah.
[all thanks to day napping which thanks to mom who made me merajuk and resort to napping]
it's 4 in the morning and most of the people i know is probably in deep slumber.
.wish i could have one.
but eyes just won't close
*sigh* .lapar pulak tu.
since i had brushed my teeth..malas la pulak nak snack.
so,here i am in front of the lappie and jumping from one blog to the other
and read.
and do surveys.
it's kinda cool to do surveys,it helps you to know a bit better about yourselves.
i rarely do it at friendster but in my blog,ok la kot.

when i went through other people's blog, it seems to me how interesting other people's life could be and makes you wonder how about yours?
are you living your life as interesting as theirs?
and cruising through my friendster account,which i am currently not so active,i found out that my page was visited by someone that i have insecurities of.
let's refer to that person as 'V'
V had live a life,of which i think, the life that i want to live with.loving family,cool friends,bla bla ..
and as days gone by, i've realized that V and i actually have some similarities of which
.i can't tell you in details.
but to put it in other words..we might have been bestfriend in other world or worst twins!
of the insecurities that i have towards V,it is a crucial truth that I actually have insecurities towards my own self,really.
.and to make things sounded more positive from my side.
V perhaps is feeling the same thing towards me.
.you think you know but you have no idea.
.and to make things sounded sooo negative from me.
sometimes i wish i could be like V. i want to be her. i want to live like her.so interesting.
.but.
reality slaps me in the face,hard. and have to admit.
as i am sitting here in my room and writing this down in my pyjama,avoiding the cold by the help of the sweater, and listening to my brother who had just came back from work creeping into his room...
.Ok..too much information dnie.
i realize that my life too has be interesting.
*tongue*
i have great family of unique personalities,
i have a boyfriend who loves me unconditionally,
i have bestfriends that i can rely on,
i have great friends scattered all over the place,
and the best of all..
.i have me.
.i am me.
maybe what i am and dear V is just a coincidence,
but i am,none other trying the best to be the purest me.
so,as i quote,
you can't hate me coz you ain't me.
*har har*